For this assignment, I chose to discuss a friend’s experience with computer based communication rather than my own because I truthfully, don’t have much experience in this area of communication. My friend, on the other hand, has plenty of experience because of her relationship with her “title-less” guy friend who lives in Washington D.C. Although the two would not consider each other boyfriend and girlfriend, they would definitely consider each other close friends, with the occasional benefits of course. They utilize mediated technology to communicate because of distance and this dynamic happens to facilitate rather than hinder their “relationship”. There are many distinctive features that exist within mediated communication that promote the formation and maintenance of my friend’s relationship according to McKenna.
One aspect of mediated communication is interactional control. The term is relatively self explanatory in that this form of communication allows my friend to have control over which medium she utilizes to interact with her “friend”. Depending on how busy her schedules is, she can choose to text message or communicate via email, contact which requires minimal amount of attention, or talk on the phone if she has the time and wishes to take part in a more meaningful conversation. What also makes this feature so important is that my friend can take advantage of selective self-presentation. For instance, when she speaks with him, she does not have to worry about her appearance. She can focus more of her attention on what she actually saying and present herself in the best light possible, instead of being concerned with how she looks.
Another distinctive feature of mediated communication that facilitates my friend’s relationship is ‘connecting to similar others’. She happens to have a lot in common with the guy she speaks to, and she has told me on numerous occasions that they can spend hours discussing their likes and dislikes regarding various topics such as movies, music, and books. Their similarity in interests creates a common ground where they can relate to each other and thus, feel close and connected.The most ironic thing about my friend’s relationship is that it is usually more satisfying when the two are apart than when together. The face to face interactions that take place between the two, usually lead to conflict whereas features within mediated interaction help to facilitates their relationship
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I think your point about your friend not having to worry about what she looked like was very interesting in understanding the physical attraction factor of online relationships. They clearly already know that they are physically attracted to each other, yet what we look like is still something that comes into play. I wonder what something like “skype” will do to long distance relationships. People love the idea that they do not have to worry about what they look like in computer mediated conversations, but what happens when you can suddenly see the other person? Disposing of the visual anonymity provided by the internet may ruin it for some people, while others may love the idea of seeing their friends and loved ones faces while far away from each other. It may depend on the individual person whether or not a technology like Skype is beneficial to a relationship or whether keeping this person out of sight, and only through text, is preferable.
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