Jarring! Disorienting! Disappointing! It sounds like the move from virtual to actual world always creates negative feelings. My friend's tale tells a different story.
In order to study abroad in any English-speaking country other than US, students must take the IELTS to prove their proficiency in English. Numerous forums have sprung online for people to exchange information regarding the test. My friend LJ was preparing to study in Britain. She joined a few forums, offering and receiving help from people in similar situations (i.e. send each other practice exams, etc). After a while, a few of them from the same city decided to meet. The results were great. They found the actual conversations in English were more helpful for their test preparation, and they got along quite well. This would seem to contradict the predictions of SIDE and hyperpersonal model, but I feel it's a combination of a few theories.
First of all, LJ's meeting was very task-oriented. Each person had a very specific goal: to improve their English. From the forum to the FtF meeting, this goal didn't change. Though they were interested in each other's life, social attractiveness wasn't their main purpose so they didn't expect much along that line. Secondly, Hyperpersonal model certainly plays a big role here. Where LJ lives, most people able to study abroad must be from a higher socioeconomic class. This is an uniting factor and a basis for great overattribution. LJ and her friends all assumed things about each other: good family background, etc. This made them think they were more alike than they really were. BUT these things were obviously not talked about in their meeting. They obviously didn't ask each other how much money their parents made. So there were basically no cues to give away their differences. Lastly, Uncertainty Reduction Theory also had a role. In the forum, you can hide rotten speaking skills if you are a good writer. But through their actual conversations, they realized their English skills were about the same. Which made them feel more alike and probably contributed to the overall success of the meeting.
To me, the relationship seems long-term (they had known each other for a few months when they met) so its positive outcome in FtF would contradict Ramiraz & Wang. But again, it's important that the meeting was task-oriented and people were probably more comfortable with each other because their goal in CMC and FtF remained the same.
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4 comments:
You took a really interesting spin on this assignment by making it applicable to situations other than friendships and dating. Of all of the involved theories you mentioned, I personally think that URT would play the biggest role for me. After dabbling for a few years in learning Spanish, I became very proficient at writing the language, but I never cultivated my would-be ability to speak it. If I were in a situation similar to your friend's, I think that meeting someone like me in an offline setting would be a very positive experience.
I really liked your post. I like how you combined a number of theories to explain your friends experience with meeting friends to help better their English. I only used one theory, the Hyperpersonal, to explain my connection to sites such as eharmony.com and match.com. I also liked how you used a real life experience, and one of your good friends so you could speak with him if need be for the write up. Good job!
I also had an experience like yours where I met a friend online through one of my friends. We both were looking for a relationship, and my friend thought that we would be the best match. We were given each other’s s/n’s and chatted from then on. We exchanged pictures and eventually met at a party and took our relationship to the next level. I would have to agree with you in this situation about the Side Theory and the Hyperpersonal Theory as well.
I really thought it was interesting how you brought in the whole ieda of task orientation. My situation was a little different from yours. I described an experience where I spoke with my boss through email and did not like him because his emails were so short and unfriendly. However when I met him in person he was a very warm and friendly person. I never thought to look at the fact that his emails were probably concise and cold because they were task oriented. He was simply trying to contact me and set up and meeting time. His emails were task oriented and perhaps thats why they were not as friendly and warm as his normal self. Good insight in your blog.
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